Too Much Budget, Not Enough Ronan

Cutting the Ronan Collins radio show for the Budget...

When innocent, and very young,
The Budget left me stewing.
Though I was forced to hold my tongue,
It spoiled my TV viewing.
And still, though quite advanced in years,
I bitterly begrudge it.
Where’s Ronan gone?
He should be on,
And not the bleedin’ Budget.

Okay, we should show int’rest in
The economic axis,
And listen to bold Brian’s spin
On pension funds and taxes.
But a big decision must be made.
Oh RTE, don’t fudge it.
The world stops turning
When Brian’s churning
Out the boring Budget.

Put it on the Six One News
And quiz financial analysts.
Certainly, let’s hear the views
Of Prime Time’s expert panellists.
But Ronan’s far more popular,
As far as I can judge it,
His song and chat
Far outstrips that
Most soporific Budget.

So RTE, next year pay heed
To list’ners to your station.
This Budget overkill doth breed
Significant frustration.
That dial upon the radio –
It don’t take much to nudge it.
From three to five,
We don’t need live
Transmission of the Budget.

For those poor anoraks who crave
Financial absolution,
Put it on the Medium Wave –
Sure, that’s the best solution.
That Budget Road is long and hard,
So please don’t make us trudge it.
Please hear our voice,
Give us the choice
Of Ronan or the Budget.